Talking with our little ones can be quite a struggle at times. We feel as if they aren’t being attentive to us; they feel like we are really not listening to them. Good listening as well as communication skills are essential to effective parenting. Your little one’s emotions, ideas and also opinions have worth, and you ought to make sure you take enough time to sit down and pay attention openly and discuss them genuinely.

This is true even when they are 3 and arguing about which outfit to wear. Their opinions are important and this is the stage of life when they are forming decision making skills. It may seem trivial to us as we are late and need them to hurry up, but this formation of ideas and opinions is an important stage of life.

It appears to be a natural tendency to react rather than to respond. We pass judgment depending on our own feelings and experiences. However, responding means being receptive to our child’s feelings and emotions and allowing them to express themselves openly and honestly without fear of repercussion from us.

It is important in times like this that your child knows that you are listening to them.  Put down what you are doing, get down to their level and look them in the eye.  Don’t multitask but give them your full and undivided attention.  Be calm and make sure your body language lets them know that you are genuinely interested in what they are saying.

Don’t discourage your child from showing their feelings even if they are anger, or frustration.  You will find out more from your child if you really listen to what they are saying and not saying.  Ask questions and find out why they are feeling that way.

Just as we do, our children have feelings and experience difficult situations. By actively listening and participating with our child as they talk about it, it demonstrates to them that we do care, we want to help and we have similar experiences of our own that they can draw from. Remember, respond – don’t react.